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Master Kidnappster - Part 1

Author: Professor Zoidy
Website: Save Our Express Ship

futurama point . fan fics . professor zoidy . master kidnappster - part 1

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Chapter One
You walk into a room, entering the Planet Express lounge, seeing a lobster-like creature. "I should warn you, I'm a mean drunk!" states Dr. Zoidberg. Dr. Zoidberg isn't your typical lobster though. For one, he can talk, and the only thing that makes him look like a lobster at all is his color and his shell. " So I've noticed.." stated Professor Zoidy, a tall girl about five foot six, who always wore the same purple tanktop every day. Bender, a former bending unit, walked in, quite impatiently, awaiting the moment to leave. " Hurry up! Let's go get hammered already!" "Ok ok, keep you head on, we're going already!" said Reyna, a girl about five feet in height, who was constantly talking nonstop, rather annoyed. The three walked out of the lounge and down the hall to the conference room, and walked through it, Fry accidentally ran into Professor Zoidy. " Oh, sorry Professor Z. I didn't see you there," said Fry with a slightly joyous tone to his voice. "You seem happy today. Did you get to make out with that radiator woman again?" Professor Zoidy asked curiously. "No..." Fry said, a little less enthusiastically. "Well, whatever the case, why not come with us to get hammered?" Professor Zoidy asked the young delivery boy. " Ok. I've got nothing better to do." Fry said, happy to be included in this trip, especially since he usually ended up messing something up somehow on every delivery mission, or any trip for that matter.
Fry wasn't the smartest person Professor Zoidy knew, but he had always been sweet, and really cared for her. He even saved the universe once from large, evil brains with his mind, and Professor Zoidy admired that a lot. He had red-orange hair that had two large spikes in it that smelled like starship fumes, but none the less, still seemed to stay perfectly in-tact, no matter how much happened to it. "Well, if any of you plan on leaving today, come on," Leela said to the crew. Leela was a one-eyed cyclops with purple hair, who always wore a white tanktop with black pants and black boots. She was captain of the Planet Express delivery ship, and flew brilliantly, despite her depth perception problem. "Where's the Professor? He usually likes coming along one these kinds of trips." Bender said aloud. "He's talking a nap and I don't think.." started Leela, but Bender cut her sentence short. " I'll go get him then. Professor, get your lazy ass in here already!"
After many more minutes of waiting for the 170 year old man, Bender dragged the Professor behind him, still asleep, and snoring quite loudly. Everyone boarded the massive, green Express ship, and Leela took off, Fry counting down before she did, why he did this though, Leela had no clue.

Chapter 2: The Drunken Idiots
The Planet Express ship soared through space effortlessly, and within twenty or so minutes, it landed in the parking lot of the Hip Joint, a restaurant that had people wearing retro clothing among other things. This was a place the crew hit quite often after missions to eat or if they felt like getting a really good martini. After making sure the ship was off and had been securely locked to make sure nobody could fly off with it, like Fry and Bender had countless times for pure merryment, everyone slowly decended the ship's stairs down to the ground and walked into the building. Music could be heard from outside, and you could see people dancing to the beat waiting to get in. Leela had always been able to get around these lines, as did the rest of the crew, since she usually brought some kind of "package" she claimed needed to be delivered. Once inside, Bender rushed to the bar and immediately ordered his own martini, while we all waited for Fry to catch up. His foot apparently got caught on one of the table's table cloths, and he was trying to get it untangled, without any luck. " Stupid table cloth..." Fry said angrily, mumbling something else nobody could hear.
It had taken Fry around five minutes to finally free himself completely, but he managed. Reyna, who had walked away from the rest of us out of Fry's stupidity, seemed to be enjoying herself with Bender. She walked back over to the crew, stumbling a little, and said in a rather drunk way, " That was...fu..nny...hah hah hah! You.. outta be a... comedian or somethin'," falling over afterwards with a hiccup. " Ok, somebody's had a bit too much alcohol for today," Professor Zoidy said to Reyna, who was laughing in a profoundly drunken way, even when she had gotten back up and stumbled over a chair on her way out the door.
"Let's roll. It's getting dark, and we have to fly around weird planets at night if we don't get out of here now." Leela said, shivering slightly at the thought. "Why don't I drive everyone home? I know how to fly the ship, and gives you a break. You seem leery about flying this late." Professor Zoidy said to Leela. "You're right, maybe I should let you drive," Leela replied a moment later after thinking about it. Professor zoidy pulled Fry aside to talk to him. " I want you to stay in the turret for the rest of the trip home. If you see anything, just call me on the vidcom, and I'll take evasive action." Fry nodded, a slightly excited glare in his eyes. He was very good at shooting down any enemy within firing range of the laser. He was the only one who could keep focused, simply because he could see space out of the clear glass and it was always an adrenaline rush when something needed to be shot at. Fry quickly climbed up into the turret just as Professor Zoidy sat down in the captain's chair to run a system check. "...Engines fully functional, let's roll!" Zoidy said as she started the ship's engine and took off, the Hip Joint now just a blur wizzing by the ship's massive windshield and side windows. Five minutes passed since they left, and already Zoidy knew why Leela was so reluctant to fly. Many gangster planets were in this section of the universe in which the re-directed spaceway route back to Earth.
The ship's lights flickered a little, startling everyone aboard. " What the hell was that?!" Bender asked, nearly screaming. " I don't know, but it can't be good whatever it is. Bender, get Leela up here now. I'll need all the help I can get to figure this out." Professor Zoidy said, almost frantically. Dr. Zoidberg popped into the main section of the ship from what seemed to be out of nowhere. " How did you get here?" asked Fry, who was thoroughly confused now. " I've been here the whole time in the cargo bay... It's my home!!" The poor lobster burst into tears, and Professor Zoidy couldn't help smiling. She walked over to him and gave him a hug and quickly let go after everyone started to stare. "What? Is it a crime to hug a lobster around here?" Zoidy asked with a small bit of angry disbelief in her voice. " Well, no, but you don't go around seeing me hugging a jerk," Bender stated in his usual crabby tone. "Anyways, back to the topic of what happened to the ship. You have any ideas Leela?" the curious Zoidy asked, since she hadn't been flying as long as Leela had, or the rest of the crew for that matter, except Reyna. " Well, it's possible something hit our ship on the way, or maybe it's a computer malfunction." Leela said, trying to be as calm as possible when she stated this to Zoidy. " I highly doubt that. It's the future. Computers aren't like what I'm used to. Besides, I checked the system a few minutes before that, and all was well." Professor Zoidy said, rather anxious. By that point, the whole crew was scared and bewildered at the same time. " I'm going to the engine room and cargo bay to check if anything happened that may be linked to this." Leela said, nervously. " I'll go too. Bender can fly the ship if necessary." Professor Zoidy said.

Chapter 3: Fears of a Captain
The Professor, also known as Professor Farnsworth, sat in one of the vacant chairs in the ship's main section, snoring away. Usually, Leela would have asked Farnsworth about the ship's problems and how to fix them if she didn't already know, but once asleep, it was nearly impossible to awake him.
* * *

Leela and Professor Zoidy slowly made their way towards the engine room, taking a flashlight just in case the power went completely out. The ship seemed to have an eerie feel to it as they made their way to their destination. The ship's lights flickered again, this time, though, they went completely out for about ten seconds, and came back on. " Uhh, on second thought, why don't we check the cargo bay first? That way, we can escape if we need too." Professor Zoidy said, clearly more freaked out now than she was five minutes before. Leela agreed wholeheartedly with this idea, and led the way down the narrow hallway towards the cargo hold. They stopped at the door, which slid open, almost completely silent, and they walked in, leery of their surroundings, and the setting it created. The two walked slowly around the entirety of the cargo hold, finding nothing but the boxes Fry and Bender used to play chess on, and packages that needed to be delivered later that week.
They soon walked back out into the hallway, the door opening once again to let them pass through, and shutting with an assuring thump on the steel floors. As the two walked once again towards the engine room, Leela accidentally tripped over her own two feet. She let out a small "ouch" and Zoidy, distracted, ran head on into a nearby wall. Professor Zoidy shook her head, halfway embarrassed that she'd done that. She helped Leela up off of the floor and they continued their walk, which ended a few moments later at the engine room doorway. They walked in, the smell of smoke and oil hanging in the air. It was absolutely silent, all except the fire burning the dark matter fuel needed to power the ship. Everything was fine, but it made the two even more uneasy that it wasn't something onboard causing the disruptions. " Well, I think we'd better get back up to the rest of the crew and see if they're ok." Professor Zoidy said, not noticing she nearly yelled it out. Leela nodded, and they both bolted down the hall.
They quickly reached their destination, Professor Farnsworth, now plainly awake. Everyone was tense, awaiting the report of something terrible. " Nothing was wrong onboard. I suspect there may be a disturbance outside the ship causing this." Professor Zoidy said to the crew. Farnsworth stood up and started to pace, thinking about the report that was just said. Even he had no explanation after pondering for about twenty agonizing, silent minutes. " Great, so now I'm trapped here with all you meatbags, about to power down completely because of lack of booze. It always ends this way! Make the robot do all of the work, and then kill him afterwards!" Bender yelled, while pulling out a cigar to smoke. He started mumbling to himself as he lit his cigar and walked to his quaters, which he shared with Fry on the ship. Leela sat down in the captain's chair and took the wheel, and changed the direction they were going. The lights flickering had made everyone forget that the ship itself was still flying. They were running out of fuel, and they would eventually have to find a place to rest, since food wasn't something they kept in stock. Nibbler usually came along, but, since Leela figured it would be a short trip, had left him with Amy and Hermes.

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